I know it’s too late. You don’t have to tell me. I messed up, I did. I know it’s all my fault. But here’s where I have a little problem. My love, I clearly remember. You held my hand, one cold night in September. And told me that everyone deserves a second chance. Sometimes even a third. This was my first mistake. I know it hurt. I said I was sorry. I pleaded. I begged. Heck, I grovelled. I knelt before you. But you still don’t believe in my love for you. That day when you left, you didn’t let me explain. I won’t say it wasn’t what it looked like. Because that would really be a lie. But I’d still like to let you know exactly what happened. So that I’ll be at ease. And we’ll both know what this means. For us. For our love. For our dreams. For our forever. For our dreams of love and our dreams of forever.

We both know you weren’t always there. Not that it’s an excuse. But here’s the problem: it was just me in that big empty house. I was all alone. Just me in the couch. And when the lights would go out, my heart would beat. And every time the floorboards creaked, I would scream. I was scared. And here’s the case where I needed a friendly face. I was desperate, please try and understand me.

When he walked through that door, he came bearing gifts. A little rum and a little coke. Harmless, or no? Soon, inebriation engulfed me. And the room swam before me. It was only natural that he bent down and kissed me. Right beneath the mistletoe. Unfortunately for us, it was nowhere near Christmas.

But fate was mean. And just then you walked in. To meet your best friend kissing me. Beneath that nonexistent evergreen leaf. There was such silence as was deafening. With downcast eyes and crestfallen expression, he walked out past your stormy demeanor, and left me to your volatile anger. Suddenly, I was stone cold sober. But not a word did you utter. You walked right by me. Upstairs and into our room. Closing the door loudly behind you. And there I was, back to being alone. My heart shattered, cause i knew I’d betrayed you. And as tears ran down my face, there grew in me a deep seated hate of the words love and loyalty. Those words that hit me right where it hurt. And of the word friendship. Whose true meaning he never discovered. Not that I’m trying to play the blame game….sigh.

But what hurt the most was when you came down the stairs. And the look in your eyes said it all. We were done. Over. Finit. I opened my mouth but no words would come out. And you left. Taking my heart with you. For weeks I called but you didn’t answer. Till three weeks later I called and she picked up. She told me to forget you. She told me to move on. She told me she was your new boo. She told me you were done with me. When I found you I apologized…or at least I tried to. Because you wouldn’t even listen. You just walked by.

So what happened to the undying love you pledged to me? I’d really like to know. I’m not saying I wasn’t wrong. But love, where’s my second chance?

Love,

Elsa.

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